Parents should teach children to be mindful of their interactions and online behavior so they have positive and safe online profiles.  This includes teaching them how to keep their accounts private, how not to over-share online or create a misleading online identity, how to spot potentially dangerous or risky connections, and how to communicate appropriately online.   

Here are seven things for parents to keep in mind as they talk to their child about social media use. 

1. Minimum Age.  Children must be 13 or older to sign up for social media accounts.  That is the law, and kids below that age should not be on social media. But even some 13-year olds may not be ready for the responsibilities of social media use.  If you think your kid isn’t ready, you should tell them and perhaps set some goals that they would have to meet to show they are ready. 
2. Do Your Research.  If parents are not already users of the social media platforms their kids want to use, they should become users and take the time to learn and understand the purposes and features of the platforms.  This means that even if a parent is already a user, if they do not already know, they should thoroughly familiarize themselves with all features and functions of the platforms their kids want to use. Parents should discuss with their child what each platform does, who uses the platform, how it is used, and what pages and services it has.  This may better equip a child to make good decisions about what to say and how to say it, as well as to avoid certain pages or services. 
3. Private Accounts Only.  Tell your kids that their accounts must be private not public, and that they should accept only friend requests or follow requests from people they know. Ask them to let you know if they keep getting requests from strangers.
4. Follow Your Kids (and Their Friends).  Tell your child that you are going to follow their accounts and their friends’ social media accounts.  Then actually do what you said and see what your child and their friends are posting. Try to figure out if their friends are age appropriate and posting about age appropriate subjects. Give them room, but stay aware.
5. No Secret Passwords. Ideally parents should know their child’s passwords. But kids may feel this is an invasion of their privacy, and they may not want to share their passwords.  If your child feels this way, you can probably learn what you need to know by monitoring your child’s and their friends’ posts on a regular basis and discussing with them anything you see that is inappropriate. 
6. Manage Usage. Social media is designed to engage its users, but it should not be an all-day activity.  Establish limits on social media usage even if  active parental enforcement of those limits may be difficult.  At least you will have discussed how social media intentionally entices persistent use and why there is a need for self-imposed limits.  
7. Encourage Constructive Use of Social Media. Help your child find peers online who share their interests or post about things they are interested in.  If your child wants to learn more about particular subjects, there may also be experts who are posting about those topics.  

Q. What piece of advice did your mother give you that was particularly valuable and useful in life?

A. My mother always encouraged me to be true to myself. The older I get, the more I appreciate and understand the value of her advice. Do not be ashamed to be who you are and do not worry about what other people think. The only way to have success, happiness and peace is to be true to yourself. You can’t do that without honoring yourself.

Q. Do you have any concrete suggestions for young people about how to be true to themselves?

A. There’s not a concrete answer. You learn through the process of growing. We know what we like and what we don’t like. Don’t listen to the outside voices, like TV, radio, the Internet and your friends. The answer lies within. Trust yourself, as opposed to following the crowd. A lot of that you can’t put into one phrase. The mother’s and father’s role today is so important and requires daily conversation with the child that fits what the child is experiencing at the time. Whatever outside pressures there may be, pay attention to what is going on inside. Get a journal, write down what’s going on, understand what you like and don’t like, pay attention to the people you are hanging around with and the impact they are having on your life.

Q. Can you share an important piece of advice you have given your daughter?

A. I tell my daughter — who is a teenager right now — that she can come to me or anybody that is in our family or in our life with an issue or a problem. She can reach out and talk to one of us. I did not do that as a kid — I did not know there was a safe place. I did not know that I could find refuge there, and as a result, life led me down a different path. I try to convey to my daughter the issues of life come from within and you need to address what is going on inside yourself. You need to find an outlet — so the problems don’t come out sideways. You can live your life on your terms. I tell my daughter she is okay the way she is. You have resources available and there’s nothing to be afraid of. I make it a point to try to instill in her to seek a spiritual solution to everything. I try to live my life that way now.

Q. Any additional advice you would give young people today?

A. One of the things I try to convey to young people is to find something they are passionate about and find how to use that passion to serve something greater than themselves. From Henry Ford, to George Washington Carver, to Harriett Tubman and Bill Gates, all of them used their passion to help humanity. So, get an education but also find your passion and use that to benefit others.

Q. Do you have a favorite charitable organization?

A. I started a foundation called Mack and Third. We started with an event a couple of years ago to benefit the homeless. We did a live performance and had corporate sponsors. The Foundation’s mission is to raise money for organizations that provide services for the homeless, abused women, women making a transition — it’s an organization that helps other organizations. This summer we are doing an event again in the city of Detroit. Mack and Third is where Detroit’s rescue mission is located. There are a lot of homeless people and substance abusers in the area. The Salvation Army is there. It is the epicenter of a lot of need.

Q. What do you consider one of your most important professional accomplishments? What is on the horizon for you next?

A. My greatest highlight recently was being nominated for two Grammys — for best male R&B vocal performance and best R&B song for Why Would You Stay from my latest album Intimacy. I was up against great competition, people like Usher and John Legend. Being nominated for a Grammy is a pretty high honor. That was the highlight of my career this year. Right now, I have just come off tour. I’m still traveling on the weekends, doing one-off performances. I’m cultivating new songs for my next album. I have also developed a new fragrance which I am in the process of naming. My plan is to continue making great music and to use my music as a ministry that can help others and build upon the gifts I have so graciously been given.

It can be quite challenging to get kids to tackle their summer reading lists or read books that are not “assigned” for school.  Beccastone spoke with Katie Titterton, communications director for the Children’s Literacy Foundation (CLiF), for some tips on why summer reading lists are important and how we can get our children to read more.

As a mentor to me and dozens of artists, art historians, collectors, students and more, Driskell  brought his personal touch to teaching, curating, collecting and writing. After he retired in 1998 as a Distinguished University Professor at the University of Maryland, Driskell flourished as an artist exploring color, nature, family, religion and the power of African ancestry. Dr. Driskell passed away peacefully in April 2020.

Born an artist

Born in Eatonton, Georgia in 1931, Driskell’s creative spirit was recognized early in his life. He eventually went to Howard University where he studied art and art history and became associated with the major figures in the field such as James A. Porter and Lois Mailou Jones. While building a career as a professor of art and art history at major universities such as Fisk University, Howard University and The University of Maryland, Driskell continuously nurtured his own artistry and has become an artist of renown in his own right. One interesting aspect of his work over the years has been his dedication to representing his family, both immediate and ancestral.

Family Spirit

Since the Harlem Renaissance, black artists have been exploring the links between Africa and African Americans. Driskell, after his 1969 trip to Nigeria, began creating works that were inspired by the spiritual connection he felt to his African ancestry. He began incorporating African masks into his paintings, prints and collages. Winged Mask, a woodcut print from 1999 is a good example of the way Driskell fuses the human face with the mask while introducing leaves and patterns for a decorative effect. He based this work on a Dan mask from the Ivory Coast that he has in his personal collection. Driskell once told me that the mask-like faces found throughout his body of work represent the collective power of the ancestors who are always present in our lives.

Much of Driskell’s work is rooted in memories of his youth, his parents and family life growing up in North Carolina. Echoes: Let the Church Roll On, 1995-96, currently in the Bowdoin College Museum of Art, is a tribute to his father’s Baptist church and ministry and represents the family chapel watched over by a protective angel floating above. Again, Driskell incorporates lush foliage that recalls the North Carolina landscape as well as his lifelong devotion to gardening. Driskell’s creative reflections on memory and ancestry remind us of the importance of family and the spiritual connections through the generations that sustain our lives.

Driskell often said that for him art is a “priestly calling.” I think of David Driskell as an evangelist who traveled the world spreading the gospel of African American art, making the most of his “calling.”

Recommended Books on David Driskell

David C. Driskell Artist and Scholar by Julie L. McGee, Pomegranate, 2006
Evolution: Five Decades of Printmaking by David C. Driskell by Adrienne L. Childs, Pomegranate, 2007

Dr. Jessica Harris is a noted author, journalist, professor, and culinary historian. Dr. Harris is a professor of English at Queens College in New York City, and was the inaugural scholar of the Ray Charles Chair in African American Material Culture at Dillard University in New Orleans. Dr. Harris’ latest book, “My Soul Looks Back”, is a memoir of her life and relationships with other black writers in the 1970’s. “High on the Hog: How African American Cuisine Transformed America”, a new Netflix documentary series, is based on one of Dr. Harris’ books of the same name. For more information about Dr. Harris, see www.africooks.com.

Q: What can parents do to encourage healthy eating?

A: Teaching by example is probably the best approach. You can also use a child’s preferences in taste to introduce them to healthy foods. We all have particular tastes. Figure out what your child likes — for example, creamy, tart, sweet or salty — and then tempt them with things that are consistent with this taste. So if your child likes creamy things, give them yogurt or cottage cheese with fruit; if they like sweet things, add honey to snacks like applies, bananas and peanut butter. Also teach children moderation, rather than telling them that certain foods they like to eat entirely off limits. So ice cream might become a once a week treat, instead of something to eat every night.

Another idea is to teach children to read labels. They might become fascinated with comparing the percentages of ingredients in different foods and what that means in terms of nutritional value. Teaching children to cook is also a way to get them more involved with healthy food.

Q: Any tips on teaching children how to cook?

A: Allow your children to be underfoot while you are cooking. Let them watch you. Even better, assign them a task and get them involved in the process. You can have them follow a recipe which gives them hands-on practice with reading, measuring and following directions. I find children more open to trying new foods when they have helped with the preparation.

Teaching your child how to cook gives you the chance to talk about family recipes and cooking “secrets” that give your child a keener sense of family history. Family recipes can serve as a bond between the generations that can be shared, enjoyed and remembered. Great recipes create lasting memories and reminders long after the original cook is gone. There are certain things that I cook that I learned from my mother and grandmother and I always think of them when I make those foods.

Q: How important is the family meal?

A: I think it’s very important. The family meal is the place where children can learn table manners and how to start and hold a conversation. They get to practice their conversation skills. When you think about it, the family dinner table is really the first place where we learn how to “play well with others.” I am also a firm believer in teaching children how to set a proper table for the meal. This is a mark of civility and home training, and every child should know how to do it.

Q: What are your favorite sources for recipes?

A: I like the site epicurious.com because it has all different types of recipes for different seasons, events, time of preparation. It has a broad choice that is bound to have recipes that meet your needs.

I should also mention that I am working on an African American food plate that contains foods that are familiar to our culture and history. The objective is to make it easier for people to pick a nutritious mix of foods from choices they recognize and know how to cook. The African American food plate will be published on my website africooks.com.

Q: What was the inspiration for your book “High on the Hog”, the basis for the new Netflix documentary series of the same name?

A: I have always been interested in history and cooking, and the book is a way of marrying these interests and telling the story of the African-American role in U.S. culinary history. As a people, we have always had a very intimate and extensive involvement with food — we grew it, we harvested it, we cooked it, and we served it. Our cooking traditions show how resourceful we are, and our ability to improvise. Many African-American cooks were at the highest level of their craft and were acknowledged masters, such as James Hemings, who was Thomas Jefferson’s Parisian-trained cook (and Sally Hemings’ brother).

Q: What advice did your mother give you that has stayed with you?

A: My mother lived the saying that it’s never too late. My mother was a trained dietician who became a master jeweler at age 65. She taught me to always keep on growing. She used to say she was “a divine work in progress.”

Q: Any new projects for you on the horizon?

A: I will continue teaching English at Queens College and consulting with Dillard University. I am working on a book on my collection of antique postcards depicting African-Americans and food. I am also editing a collection of works on African-American material culture

Renowned culinary historian Dr. Jessica B. Harris is the author of 11 books and the world’s leading expert on the foodways of the African diaspora. Dr. Harris has shared her scholarship with audiences around the world, in print and live, including at such major museums as the American Museum of Natural History in New York, the California Academy of Sciences in San Francisco and the Smithsonian Institution in Washington, DC.

Q. What piece of advice did your mother give you that has stayed with you?
A. As a kid, I thought this was so corny, but now I get it. My mom told me to always be true to you. She would see me hanging around all these different kids, first when we lived in Atlanta and then we moved to Houston. Everywhere I went I wanted to fit in with whoever I was with at the time. My mom would tell me, “You don’t have to be like everybody else, you don’t have to agree with what everyone else says. Have your own opinions, be proud to be a young black woman.”

Q. What advice would you give kids today?
A. I don’t have any kids of my own yet. But I have two godchildren who I spend a lot of time with. I guess I would share my mom’s quote of be true to you. I would tell kids to look at yourself in the mirror and see what comes to mind, what you think about yourself. Learn about yourself before you invite everyone else into your world. Develop your own style.

Q. Tell us about the foundation you started.
A. I started I Heart My Girlfriend to give young women the space to support each other. Young ladies go through a lot and they need girlfriends who don’t judge them. I Heart My Girlfriend is about coming together instead of tearing down. We recently sponsored a lunch, at a high school in Texas, where we brought together about 120 girls. We started out with some exercises that helped everyone get to know each other better. Eventually, the girls began to talk about scars from the past and how they feel about these things now. The girls found out they have a lot in common with each other. Our goal is for girls to understand we are all the same and go through the same things. There is no need for hatred and insecurities. It’s about building up young girls’ sense of self-esteem.

Q. What is on the horizon for you professionally?
A. I am so excited about my new album. I worked so hard on it and I have such a great team behind me. For me it was about not putting limits on myself which is what I did in the past. I am very proud of this record.

Q. What was the inspiration for the album?
A. I was inspired by the many women I know who have accomplished so much. People like Oprah, Tyra Banks, Beyonce, and Sylvia Rhone. There are so many women who have worked hard for many years. We have no idea how much we inspire and lift each other up. This is the year of the woman for me.

Q. When will the album come out?
A. Look for it late summer.